“We must acquire a larger vessel.”
- Jaws“I’m growing impatient with these malevolent slithering reptiles on this bloody aircraft.”
- Snakes on a Plane“Toodeloo you ghastly miscreant.”
- Die Hard 1,2,3,4“Please remove your simian appendages from my person, you unwashed gorilla man-thing.”
- Planet of the Apes
“There is a herptile in my western footwear!”
- Toy Story“I shall return.”
- Every Arnold Schwarzenegger movie“I am now fully versed in the combat stylings of “Kung Fu.”
- The Matrix“I do wish I could cease committing acts of sodomy unto your delightful buttocks.”
- Brokeback Mountain“My dearest apologies Captain, I have configured this vessel to it’s maximum efficiency. Alas, if you wish me to attempt to defy the laws of physics, I shall increase my efforts.”
- various Star Trek movies and episodes“Does Marsellus Wallace match the appearance of a female canine? Then why is it, good sir, that you are attempting to have coital relations with him, as if he were a female canine?”
- Pulp Fiction“I do not believe that is an orbiting planetary body, but in fact a massive facility constructed exclusively for use in space.”
-Star Wars: A New Hope“Oh dear. I do believe that when we dined on this soylent green, the main ingredient was in fact human beings. In its defense, twas better than English food.”
- Soylent Green“I say to thee honestly milady, I am an indifferent.”
- Gone With the Wind“It’s an elaborate ruse!”
- Return of the Jedi“Miss Scarlett, I regret to inform you that I am uneducated in the field of obstetrics.”
- Gone With the Wind“Fare thee well, infant.”
- Terminator 2: Judgement DayDid you get them all? Have any to add?
roflrofl
She could see the men who invited Osama bin Laden into the country, the men who introduced the misogynist laws later followed by the Taliban, the men who had massacred Afghan civilians. Some had got there by intimidating the electorate, others by vote-rigging, and yet more were simply appointed by Hamid Karzai, the former oilman installed by the US army to run the country. She thought of an old Afghan saying: “It’s the same donkey, with a new saddle.”
For a moment, as these old killers started to give long speeches congratulating themselves on the transition to democracy, Joya felt nervous. But then, she says, “I remembered the oppression we face as women in my country, and my nervousness evaporated, replaced by anger.”
When her turn came, she stood, looked around at the blood-soaked warlords on every side, and began to speak. “Why are we allowing criminals to be present here? They are responsible for our situation now… It is they who turned our country into the centre of national and international wars. They are the most anti-women elements in our society who have brought our country to this state and they intend to do the same again… They should instead be prosecuted in the national and international courts.”
These warlords – who brag about being hard men – could not cope with a slender young woman speaking the truth. They began to shriek and howl, calling her a “prostitute” and “infidel”, and throwing bottles at her. One man tried to punch her in the face. Her microphone was cut off and the jirga descended into a riot.
“From that moment on,” Joya says, “I would never again be safe… For fundamentalists, a women is half a human, meant only to fulfil a man’s every wish and lust, and to produce children and toil in the home. They could not believe that a young woman was tearing off their masks in front of the eyes of the Afghan people.”
speechless. she came and spoke at berkeley a week ago. dolt that i am, i missed it.
More scientific evidence for your MOAR COFFEE pleas.
After all it IS Monday….found at Tom Oatmeal.
pained grimace.
